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Movie Review: Rustom

It’s good to watch movies. Good or bad. Gives one an idea about the kind of things film makers are thinking about and if they do have the pulse of their audience. With Rustom they succeeded in breaking out of the run-of-the-mill Bollywood masala grist and yet failed to craft a taut film that makes the movie goer sigh/nod in appreciation.

Based quite obviously on the Nanavati case that rocked the India of the 50s, the movie has a very staged look and feel with the characters not quite coming across as convincing in the roles they are essaying.

Akshay Kumar looks good in uniform. For a man his age he is in fine form physically but is rather wooden. He doesn’t come across as a Parsi at all and wears his uniform throughout the movie without it ever getting creased or dirty even while he’s incarcerated. Full marks to the jail dhobi!

Illeana D’Cruz looks pretty as a picture. Wears simple and elegant sarees and is quite effective as an ornamental prop. She neither carries the weight or punch that the role requires.

Esha Gupta smoulders like a femme fatale would and is by turns slutty and pull of pouty attitude. If attitude was the only requirement that the role had then she aced it and how! Barring that, she too has very little meat in her role and comes across as a spoiled rich socialite and not much else.

Arjan Bajwa is quite well cast. You can feel the smarminess come off him in waves and I can see him getting typecast as a Lothario in future projects.

People like Sachin Khedekar are rather miscast and arereduced to being ranting buffoons who really don’t belong in a biopic; even a loose one.

Anang Desai, Kanwaljeet Singh and Usha Nadkarni in their supporting roles add the necessary flavor and yet, despite it all, the movie leaves you wanting.

It doesn’t end in a manner which satisfies but neither does it disappoint in toto.

A bit of a limbo of a film and yet it’s good to see Khiladi Kumar embrace more roles of this ilk. He’s moved way past his Churake Dil Mera days...

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Under Siege- Always A Good Idea

Most movie reviews start with a title that lets you know that there’s a review coming your way. Mine hasn’t done that. Tough.

Steven Seagal may be bloated and a Putin-loving, firearms-promoting Buddhist but many, many, many years ago he was slightly attractive (to Moi) and was kicking ass in his own minimalistic way. I say minimalistic because there seemed to be an economy of movement rather than the rabid monkey style that Jackie Chan’s movies seem to employ.

The reason a good action movie is usually a good idea is because they’re not overly long, they keep up a good solid pace and use tongue-in-cheek or even hit-in-you-in-the-face kinda humor while piling up the body count.

Under Siege is as typical as American action movies get where the foreign powers aren’t trying to invade their shores. With Gary Busey’s mean portrayal of Commander Krill and Tommy Lee Jones‘ near convincing of an off-the-walls  Strannix, this movie is a must-watch for its bad guys alone. But then Seagal saunters in with his slow, unhurried drawl about automatic and semi-automatic and you want to see how far Casey Ryback goes from chopping carrots to dispatching the bad guys all in the same non-hyper monkey style.

In short? Grab some popcorn and switch on Seagal and sail away on the USS Missouri!

 

To Lynch Or Not To Lynch

Let me start by saying that I’ve usually felt that Salman Khan is akin to a horse’s ass. He isn’t that good an actor and the only thing I can say in his favor is that at his age, keeping up with that kind of body and dancing like a lunatic takes stamina. So yay…kudos […]

A Little Latin Goes A Long Way

I came across this phrase today and it seemed to encapsulate how the world seems to me of late-HOMO SUM HUMANI A ME NIHIL ALIENUM PUTO. What it means is ” I am a human being, so nothing human is strange to me”. Over time it has come to be used as a motto advocating respect for people and cultures that appear different from your own. Quite the antithesis of the prevailing times, one might say.

Things have been shitty on a global scale for a long time. There are actually shitty things happening. They are in turn giving rise to fear of the said shitty things happening whether it’s a well-founded fear or pure paranoia. And in trying to take preventive action or being ready before the big one strikes, people are screwing up on a truly epic scale.

Call it intolerance. Call it a phobia. Call it ignorance. Call it what you will but labeling it something specific won’t make it any more real than how it already is.

Kindergartners gunned down. People of a particular sexual orientation. People of specific races, genders- everything and everyone is under fire. And while people speaking up against it may lead to a certain amount of ignorance getting dispelled, but for the most part, people stick to their beliefs come what may. And woe betide you if you try to shake it out of them.

So when tomorrow’s newspaper will inevitably bring news of something unjustifiable cruel, morally and ethically reprehensible; I will not gasp, cringe or shudder. Because I am a human being and nothing human is strange to me. Even inhumanity.

 

The Mine Field That Is My House

Many moons ago I had spewed a bit via this post but last night I realized that my modest home is quite fraught with stuff that’s likely to blow up (figuratively) or cause me to blow up (literally).

Case in point- My kid and his quest for building a dino army keeps showing up (read under) all foreseeable and some not so foreseeable places. Last night’s trip to the bedroom was an obstacle course par excellence!

This is how it went down- focus on the word down. Now the charming child I’ve brought into this world, had locked Red and I out of our bedroom? Did I mention we’ve been co-sleeping, exclusively? It’s not fun. But since his room and ours has a connecting window that opens up from his room, I thought I’d sorted things out quite alright. Erm…not quite.

So just on the other side of MLM’s window is a futon and ahead of the futon is a few open feet of room followed by the bed. I always keep a bit of a gap between the window and the futon for these reasons and also to make it easier to sweep and mop but that was to be my downfall in every sense of the word.

So the space behind the futon was littered with dinos. The pointy kinds. I think the beak of a Quetzalcoatlus (pronounced as  /ˌkwɛts(ə)lkəʊˈatləs/ for those who give a damn) or a Pteranodon (drop the P while saying it and you’re gravy) poked me in my foot leading me to leapfrog over the entire width of the futon and step on a Hotwheels car that effectively got me half airborne till I broke my fall on the futon. And being the superb athelete that I am, I was suprised that nothing was broken…bones and futon included.

So up I get, seething in anger and ready to grab the kid by the scruff of his neck and dump him in his room and his quite comfortable bed when I stepped on a marble and hopped on one foot to go and sit on the air conditioner’s remote which was parked right where I would normally sleep!

A lopsided, ballet through the air to land in a graceless manner in a bed where a rapidly growing child was sleeping diagonally across. Naturally.

Oh by the way, did I mention it was rather dark in the room just the LED glow from the AC spread a dim light over a negligible part of the room? Nevermind…that’s usually a given.

 

Out Of The Mouth of Babes

Well…just one babe to be precise. Mine. To be more..preciser(?).

This summer holiday has been fun for the brat. He’s always very happy with my folks and despite the heavier discipline here than at home, he manages to get away with doing his thing most of the times because we love his buck-toothed, lisping, pug-nosed, long-lashed self and he knows it too!

Some of the funnier (and always cute, let’s not forget that) stuff he’s said to me over the last few days make me laugh each time I think about it so am sharing it here with those who peak at my blog from time to time.

The cutest thing #1- Ayu (he always prefixes EACH AND EVERY SENTENCE with that word) if I kiss you, you’ll become a frog! And seeing my WTF expression he hastily explained…” don’t be upset. If you turn into a frog that means you are going to become a princess later.” For those who are feeling all at sea, the allusion is from Disney’s The Princess and the Frog.

The cutest thing#2- Ayu…I made lunch for you (indicating some utensils he picked up from my mom’s kitchen). It’s DEE-LI-SHUSH! It’s rice, banana and mushroom. All the things you like to eat!!

The cutest thing #3- Ayu…my tooth fall down (said with a really sad face after an extremely loose tooth fell out while he was rinsing his mouth). I need my tooth BECAUSE the Tooth Fairy won’t give me toys without my tooth.

There are other cute things he’s been spouting as well but these have been by far the cutest ones uttered.

Of course the one that took the cake was when he asked me if I knew that when he was a baby he was in my tummy and I had to make the proper astonished ‘you-don’t-say- face and send him off happy that he gave me an earth shattering news.

Such is the world we live in.

Amen!!

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Movie Review-Captain America: Civil War

Image courtesy Google Images

It’s been AGES since I saw a movie on the same day it released. Probably not since 04 but then that’s too far into the past for me to dredge up the when and wherefores.

I generally enjoy the offerings from the Marvel universe. Captain America is the typical boy scout but he’s easy on the eyes and then Iron Man? Forget about it! uttered in a pseudo Italiano-Americano accento!

I was waiting for this new installment of Captain America because I wanted to know what new person, event, catastrophe they could throw into the mix to make the movie engrossing.

And they came up with a fairly plausible one- a wronged soldier who goes vigilante and wants to bring down the wrath of…well himself on the Avengers! As far as plots go, not bad. The action is as always, over the top but damn enjoyable. Iron Man does seem to enjoy top billing in the Avenger movies maybe due to the guy who plays him but I find that I missed the chemistry between Pepper Potts and Tony Stark in this movie. Gwenyth Paltrow probably being too busy in promoting Goop!

But back to reviewing the movie- in a nutshell? Eat at home and save yourself the money for the popcorn and soda because it’s nearly a 2 1/2 hour-long movie and you need munchies while the drama unfolds and the super-powered punches are thrown all over the place.

Thor and The Hulk being the big misses here especially because they did have some screen time in the first Avengers movie and did what they were supposed to and in the second one there was a nice little thing happening between The Widow and Hulk.

C.A.C.W- is about friendship. Redemption and essentially Big Brother trying to control the “greater good” and Tony Stark’s need to have the last word.

Read the wikipedia page for the spoilers because I don’t want to be the reason someone doesn’t go and buy overpriced popcorn to watch this movie.

I was surrounded by high school and college boys who were whopping along with Iron Man and shrieking whenever someone got slammed into concrete or some or equally hard surface and realized that these movies make you feel younger and somewhat mindless. But it’s fun so it’s all good!